Donald Trump spontaneously wandered out onto the White House roof yesterday in what appeared to be a Choose Your Own Adventure series titled “Diddler on The Roof: Alziemeher’s Edition.” But it was all just a simple misunderstanding. Apparently, Trump thought the best remedy for swollen cankles was to go onto the roof, after doctors advised […]
Read More We Wanted Trumpty Dumpty, We Got Diddler On The Roof!!!Donald Trump took time out of avoiding accusations about his creepy past to open up to Newsmax about his 27-year-old Press Secretary’s fuckability. Because nothing screams, “I’m a reformed pedophile” more than hornily hitting on an employee who was -2 years-old back when Trump was barely a 50-year-old wingman for Jeffrey Epstein. Then again, only […]
Read More Trump’s Horned-Up Newsmax Interview Made America Nauseous Again!!!Credit where credit is due, Donald Trump’s name is not in the Epstein Files. Sure, it took thousands of FBI agents working around the clock to make all the evidence disappear, but that’s only because redacting files is much more time-consuming than staging a murder to look like a suicide. And in case you’re wondering […]
Read More FBI Wipes the Epstein Files Clean Of Trump’s Fingerprint!!!Sure, most people don’t feel the need to randomly call their friends, to not so subtly convince them that they had no involvement in another person’s suicide. But, then again, this is Donald Trump we’re talking about. A man who, when others are playing checkers, calls them out of the blue to ask if Jeffrey […]
Read More Trump Calling Friends To Convince Them He Didn’t Kill Epstein Is A Bit Of A Red Flag!!!Somehow, Donald Trump has enough breakup stories about Jeffrey Epstein to supply Taylor Swift with a double album. But much like his diapers, when the press gets a whiff of something that doesn’t smell right, it’s time for Trump to change his story. And since Mar-A-Largo was already known as Epstein Island’s scouting combine, Trump […]
Read More Epstein Dumped Trump Over Russian Money Laundering Deal!!!Charlie Kirk, MAGA’s notorious mouthpiece, whose refusal to shut the fuck up for more than two minutes at a time, not only earned him a place high atop the fascist-foodchain but ultimately cost him first prize at last year’s Mr. Bean look-a-like contest. Now, along with being Harper College’s biggest regret, this bigotted buzz kill […]
Read More Charlie Kirk Took Time Out Of Housing Baby Ruths With Chunk To Blame DEI For Texas Floods!!!It’s been a tough week for the Trump Regime; not only did they learn Iran’s Supreme Leader appears more popular among the MAGA-first crowd than their own guy. But when the President was told his poll numbers were dangerously low, instead of taking the Iran crisis more seriously, Trump said, “Problem solved, I’ve got a […]
Read More Trump Spent $100,000 On Flag Poles And Somehow “The Fake News” Still Reports Low Poll Numbers!!!Credit where credit is due, Trump is going all-in on his MAGA-First policy, not only ignoring Ukrainian military deficiencies but also the Israeli bombing campaign on Iran’s Nuclear facilities. No, instead, he is willfully neglecting chaos abroad to remain laser-focused on American military needs at home. Do you think Gavin Newsom possesses the foresight and […]
Read More Trump’s MAGA-First Policy Has Devolved Into A Worlds-Gone-Wild Infomercial!!!Marjorie Taylor Greene is now openly admitting she would have never voted for Trump’s bill if she had only known what was in it. However, she claims it wasn’t her fault because her vote had already been cast before she had a chance to read all about its content on her Twitter feed. Apparently, Greene […]
Read More Marjorie And Musk’s MAGA Meltdown!!!Elon Musk showed up at the White House yesterday the way most people arrive at their intervention, sporting a fresh black eye and dressed like he had just hitchhiked from a club promoter’s funeral. So it was no surprise when The NY Times reported that Elon Musk was hopped up on so much Ketamine during […]
Read More If Peeing Your Pants Is Cool, Then Consider Musk, Miles Davis!!!
THE-ANTI-SOCIAL-MEDIA 