

I realize Donald Trump, the main reason the phrase is now “You’ve got to suck a few dicks to make an omelette,” is considered the Russian nesting doll of distractions. However, while most people assume that what you’ll find under all those layers of gross is the pedophilia truth about the Epstein files. I am firmly in the camp that Trump’s true buried secret is his obsession with holding onto power, and the unlimited amounts of dicks HE’D suck just to successfully steal all of the elections. I mean, it’s one thing to openly admit you want to fuck your own underage daughter on “The View,” but to wear it like a badge of honor takes a black hole-level of shame in your game normally reserved for step-mom porn. So do you really think the guy who made “Grab ’em by the pussy” his 2016 campaign slogan gives a single fuck about being labeled a sex offender for the billionth time? Fuck no, the only thing that keeps DJT up at night (besides debilitating loneliness and a dirty diaper) is the thought of someone else’s grubby paws all over his Presidential immunity. Because being a diddler might be acceptable behavior in right-wing Christian circles, but it is still strictly frowned upon in prison. And the last thing Donald Trump wants is to spend his few remaining weeks on this planet getting spray-tanned with SPF cell-block-D-N-A.









In Today’s Palate Cleanser, we learn that microplastics in our water are broken down even faster in the sunlight. Prompting The Daily Show to satirize the issue and Trump to threaten a military invasion of the sun.




The Science Daily Article Quoted – https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2025/12/251224032408.htm

