Trump Defies Old Age, Somehow Pats Himself On The Back For An Entire Middle-East Trip!!!

Donald Trump pulled off an amazing accomplishment this week, and I would consider myself a hater if, for once, I couldn’t put my differences aside to acknowledge this achievement. So, credit where credit is due: congratulations, Donald Trump. Most men your age not only tear a rotator cuff patting themselves on the back, but don’t […]

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Trump Plans To Call Dibs On The Gaza Coast And Rename It Trump’s Noble Beach Prize!!!

Donald Trump is traveling to the Middle East, not only to sign a Hamas-Israeli peace agreement, but to officially call dibs on the Gaza coastline and rename it Trump’s Noble Beach Prize. However, when it comes to ending the war, it’s obvious Trump also has some non-Nobel Peace Prize ulterior motives. After all, when asked […]

Read More Trump Plans To Call Dibs On The Gaza Coast And Rename It Trump’s Noble Beach Prize!!!

A Qatari Air Force Base In Idaho Is Sending Some Serious “America First” Mixed Messages!!!

Sure, Donald Trump has an “America First” agenda, but so did Osama Bin Laden, and I don’t remember Fox News calling him “Patriotic”. I mean, allowing Qatar’s Air Force to set up shop in Idaho might be good news for the state’s lone Halal grocery shop, “Atta Boy’s,” but not so much for the residents […]

Read More A Qatari Air Force Base In Idaho Is Sending Some Serious “America First” Mixed Messages!!!

Marjorie Taylor Greene Is Absolutely Nailing Her Squad Audition!!!

Marjorie Taylor Greene: Republican congresswoman, who continues to vote against her own party’s interests, which not only earned her the title MAGA Manchin, but her recent support of Democrats puts an entirely new spin on the slogan “Back the Blue.” The once HMIC(Head-MAGAT-In-Charge) now appears to cherish her new role as GOP spoiler as she […]

Read More Marjorie Taylor Greene Is Absolutely Nailing Her Squad Audition!!!

Thanks To Trump’s Government Shutdown, Air-Traffic Controllers Are Winging It!!!

Donald Trump took time out of hanging federal employees, no longer useful to him, out to dry, or, as KKKaroline calls it, “The Epstein Severance Package,” to send Secretary of Transportation Sean Duffy (The one Trump appointee who heard the MAGA slogan “Trans For Everyone”, and thought “My job just got a whole lot harder!”) […]

Read More Thanks To Trump’s Government Shutdown, Air-Traffic Controllers Are Winging It!!!

Bleach Bondi Goes Full “Mean Girls” At Hearing After Photos Reveal Her Senator Burn Book!!!

Attorney General and inspiration for MAGA Cunt Barbie, Pam Bondi, proved once again why she is so uniquely qualified to be Matt Gaetz’s Sloppy-Seconds. Bleach Bondi arrived at yesterday’s Senate hearings armed with only a notebook, her personality, and looks, all of which can be described as even more damaging to the evil stepmom image […]

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Trump: If Government Shutdowns Are This Fun, Perhaps I Should’ve Read Project 2025!!!

Speaker Mike Johnson (a man so unlikeably religious he says grace before eating ass) speaks to the press about Donald Trump as though he’s bragging about some smoking-hot Canadian girlfriend that just doesn’t exist. Which is sad for multiple reasons, but mainly because we all know Trump, and we’d trade that fat POS for the […]

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Trump’s Military Frowns Upon Beards, Fatsos, Women, Americans, And N-Words!!!

Donald Trump took time out of his busy, shutting-down-the-government schedule (or, as he prefers to call forcing people to work without pay, “The Art of the Steal!”) to gather all the US Generals stationed around the globe for whatever the fuck a “Warriors’ Ethos Pep Rally” means.  Well, as it turns out, labeling an Authoritarianism […]

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Thanks To Fox News, Trump Declared War On Portland To Stop The 2020 Protests!!!

Congratulations, Donald Trump, even being judged, on a pig-who-ate-his-own-blanket scale, you’re still a fucking meathead. This entire Trump misnomer, Portland, Oregon, “is in shambles,” all started a few weeks back when Fox News mistakenly aired footage from the 2020 BLM protests, and like any dementia-riddled Grandma seeing an AI image for the first time, Trump […]

Read More Thanks To Fox News, Trump Declared War On Portland To Stop The 2020 Protests!!!