Tag: Colin Jost

We’re Being Lied To, We’re Being Murdered…Our Pets Heads Are Falling Off!!!

Donald Trump, a man who wants to protect Americans from immigrants so much that he’s willing to kill every last citizen just to prove it. Renee Good and Alex Pretti weren’t collateral damage; they were fascism’s strategic write-offs. Pretti WAS however, brandishing a weapon to interfere with an ICE operation. But that operation wasn’t to […]

Read More We’re Being Lied To, We’re Being Murdered…Our Pets Heads Are Falling Off!!!

Trump, First War Criminal Awarded Participation Peace Prize!!!

Donald Trump recently received FIFA’s first-ever Peace Prize. An award ceremony with all the pomp and circumstance of the Oscars and the prestige of finding a Female Body Inspector (FBI) T-shirt in the Hooters’ dumpster. Because the only international sports organization award Trump is earning on merit is a participation medal from the Special Olympics. […]

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Congratulations, Chuck Schumer; At Least, The Baileys Are Happy!!!

The government shutdown is unofficially over. Republicans can finally celebrate losing healthcare for millions of Americans, unlike Democrats, who couldn’t make it an entire week without accidentally shooting the country in the dick again. Although Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer will sleep soundly knowing that the Shutdown is nearing its end. Now that his imaginary […]

Read More Congratulations, Chuck Schumer; At Least, The Baileys Are Happy!!!