Tag: CNN

Trump’s Gunt, About The Gruesome Angle Of The Time Cover Photo: “I Warned You!”

Donald Trump, fresh off claiming victory in the war against waste, fraud, abuse, and the American Soybean Farmer, was photographed for the cover of Time Magazine, in what’s being called the most unflattering Presidential headshot since the JFK assassination. The picture, which answers the question, “What’s the point of view of Trump’s gunt?” Appears to […]

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Marjorie Taylor Greene Is Absolutely Nailing Her Squad Audition!!!

Marjorie Taylor Greene: Republican congresswoman, who continues to vote against her own party’s interests, which not only earned her the title MAGA Manchin, but her recent support of Democrats puts an entirely new spin on the slogan “Back the Blue.” The once HMIC(Head-MAGAT-In-Charge) now appears to cherish her new role as GOP spoiler as she […]

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Congressional Subpoena Lands Ghislaine Maxwell On The Endangered Species List!!!

Congressman Tim Burchett motioned to subpoena Epstein-Madam and Bottom Bitch, Ghislaine Maxwell, to testify before the House Oversight Committee. A move that not only forced Speaker Johnson to send Congress home early for summer break, giving Marjorie Taylor Greene even more time to shatter her all-time Bourbon Street beads-for-boobs record, but also forced Donald Trump […]

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Is Ghislaine Maxwell’s Legal Winning Streak Payment For Her Silence?!?

It appears that while Ghislaine Maxwell plays chess, Donald Trump chews the Connect Four box open. Considering Trump fired the lead federal prosecutor on both the Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell sex trafficking cases, Maurene Comey, from the Department of Justice. For some totally legitimate reason, like she knows too much, or her FBI Director […]

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FEMA’s Texas Response Slowed Because Cosplay Kristi’s Scuba Gear Was Lost In The Attic!!!

It turns out that when young girls were being swept away from camp cots by deadly Texas flood waters, FEMA search and rescue teams were forced to sit on their thumbs for 72 hours waiting for Cosplay Kristi Noem to sign off on their deployment. However, it turns out she was far too busy asking […]

Read More FEMA’s Texas Response Slowed Because Cosplay Kristi’s Scuba Gear Was Lost In The Attic!!!

Habeas Corpus Denier Kristi Noem Challenges Harvard’s Grasp Of The Law!!!

Kristi Noem, fresh off proving her understanding of constitutional law, wasn’t nearly as extensive as her collection of bedazzled bulletproof vests after getting wedgied in front of Congress by the definition of habeas corpus. And while the shame alone would debilitate most, it somehow didn’t discourage the c#nty cosplay queen from taking on Harvard Law’s […]

Read More Habeas Corpus Denier Kristi Noem Challenges Harvard’s Grasp Of The Law!!!

Trump Interrupts His Bullsh*t Claims Of White Genocide To Call The Press Fake News!!!

Trump flipped the fuck out on a reporter yesterday after asking a reasonable question everyone, including the South African President, busy getting slandered, wanted an answer to. Ironically, Trump called NBC’s Peter Alexander “Fake News” for interrupting his baseless MAGA make-believe presentation. But obviously, Donald got genuinely upset when the romantic mood lighting and nonexistent […]

Read More Trump Interrupts His Bullsh*t Claims Of White Genocide To Call The Press Fake News!!!

RFK Jr Testified Under Oath To Congress That He’s Completely Full Of Sh*t!!!

RFK JR, the unfortunate fallout of the Kennedy family now being gun-shy about lobotomies, testified under oath to Congress, “I don’t think people should be taking medical advice from me.” Quite a shocking revelation for a man whose existence revolves entirely around spreading unsolicited medical disinformation like a defective Dr. Know-It-All. Well then, what’s next? […]

Read More RFK Jr Testified Under Oath To Congress That He’s Completely Full Of Sh*t!!!