Donald Trump recently received FIFA’s first-ever Peace Prize. An award ceremony with all the pomp and circumstance of the Oscars and the prestige of finding a Female Body Inspector (FBI) T-shirt in the Hooters’ dumpster. Because the only international sports organization award Trump is earning on merit is a participation medal from the Special Olympics. […]
Read More Trump, First War Criminal Awarded Participation Peace Prize!!!Donald Trump announced he will not subvert the release of the Epstein files, but will sure as shit give a full pardon when Pam Bodi does. That’s the thing about pledging loyalty to a Sex Offender: you’re not only forced to kiss Trump’s ass, but to also eat it. Which is nothing compared to the […]
Read More Trump Won’t Derail The Release Of The Epstein Files, But An Open Investigation Will!!!Donald Trump, a man who, up until last week, thought the Senate’s “nuclear option” required prior weapons testing and that the filibuster was the wear-and-tear struggle between his cankles and socks. Now knows bipartisanship isn’t reached through healthy debate and negotiation, but by intentionally delaying Democrats’ food assistance and Republicans’ private jets. Sure, helping Trump […]
Read More Someone Is Getting The Band Back Together!!!You would assume Donald Trump would have a lot more in common with a bunch of land-owning white guys who didn’t want to pay taxes and thought minorities shouldn’t vote. Yet, if you’ve read the American Founding Fathers’ Declaration of Independence, it sounds more like Jefferson’s 1-star Yelp review of Trump’s presidency. Trump has so […]
Read More The Declaration Of Independence Reads Like A 1-Star Yelp Review Of Trump’s Presidency!!!Karoline Leavitt took time out of deflecting Epstein questions to blame Trump’s sudden cankle-to-thankle* downgrade (*thigh-sized ankle) and skin falling off like a wet Band-Aid, on a minor vein condition. That is apparently brought on by a vigorous regimen of aspirin, handshakes, and a refusal to admit when your diaper is dirty. A prognosis that […]
Read More Cankles: The Trump Update No One Wanted!!!The Supreme Court has pieced together rulings over the past couple of years that have cleared the pathway for authoritarian rule and created a Dr. Frankenstein-like tyrannical monster, Dictator Trump, out of soulless nepotism leftovers and spoiled sex offender parts. And after stripping the authority away from lower courts this week, they’ve slowly removed all […]
Read More The Supreme Court Isn’t Protecting Against A Trump Dictatorship, They’re An Accomplice To It!!!The Senate attended a classified briefing on Operation Midnight Hammer, AKA the codename for the US bombing campaign on Iran, and also how Pete Hegseth describes his rigorous late-night masturbatory sessions. And despite both Democrats and Republicans disagreeing along party lines on Trump’s assessment of the bombing’s effectiveness, they did, however, unanimously agree that Trump […]
Read More Both Democrat And Republican Senators Agree Iran Bombing Did Happen… And That’s About It!!!Los Angeles is currently under siege, and not from thousands of overly-caffeinated Uber drivers sending a message to the driverless car industry. No, this was an entirely MAGAfactured crisis from a blossoming dictatorship, and declaring war on Los Angeles is about as foolproof a distraction as it gets short of admitting the 2020 election was […]
Read More Trump’s MAGA-Factured L.A. Crisis, Has Erased All His Butthurt-BFF’s Pedophilia Talk!!!So, DOGE-Bag-in-Chief Elon Musk will attend Trump’s State of the Dictatorship speech as his guest. During the event, it appears Musk will be positioned inside the First Lady’s box. Which, much like the State of New York, is another venue where Trump has been banned from conducting his sordid business. Musk’s appearance is a follow-up […]
Read More Interim First Lady Musk Will Be Trump’s Date At His State Of The Dictatorship Speech!!!Trump and his unelected trigger man Elon Musk have been on a relentless termination spree that has victimized more former American military members than toxic burn pits. Many of those veterans were disabled in battle and could no longer be on active duty. Choosing to serve their country in other ways as civil servants. But […]
Read More Disabled Veterans Are Targeted By Trump’s Chaos, Cruelty, And Corruption!!!
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