After Donald Trump said he wouldn’t stop MAGA from voting their conscience, all but Congressman Clay Higgins voted to release the Epstein files. A turnout that not only convinced Clay Higgins to unmute his GOP Signal chat but also solidified the deportation of Trump’s “Reverse-Psychology Guy.” Sure, Democrats never believe a word Trump says, and […]
Read More Clay Higgins Earns Coveted NAMBLA Endorsement!!!Now that the discharge petition has reached the necessary 218 votes to release the Epstein files, the GOP suddenly realizes they can no longer protect Donald Trump. Sure, their first instinct was to jump into bed with a sex offender, but even Republicans prefer covering their own ass to getting fucked by a pedophile. Which […]
Read More The Groupies Of Pedophiles (GOP) Are Stuck Between A Rock And A Sex Offender!!!Has anyone else noticed that Marjorie Taylor Greene has been demanding the release of the Epstein Files and blaming the GOP for the government shutdown, and John Fetterman’s day is spent trashing Democrats on Fox News? Which begs the question: Are MTG and Fetterman involved in some sorta bipartisan body swap, like “Freaky Friday,” but […]
Read More Is There A White Trash Freaky Friday Happening In Congress?!?With “No Kings” Part Deux upon us, Donald Trump plans to play Battleship with Navy Warships and fire missiles into Camp Pendleton, California, in the worst Hasbro game-inspired bombing since Rihanna sank her “Battleship” movie. Thankfully, the folks holding down the fort at Democracy’s Alamo, The Meidas Touch Network, broke the news about the Department […]
Read More Navy Warships To Fire Missiles Into California During “No Kings” Protest!!!Speaker Mike Johnson (a man so unlikeably religious he says grace before eating ass) speaks to the press about Donald Trump as though he’s bragging about some smoking-hot Canadian girlfriend that just doesn’t exist. Which is sad for multiple reasons, but mainly because we all know Trump, and we’d trade that fat POS for the […]
Read More Trump: If Government Shutdowns Are This Fun, Perhaps I Should’ve Read Project 2025!!!This country has officially sleepwalked itself into an American dictatorship, and Donald Trump will do anything in his power to ensure that the public doesn’t wake up before the 2026 elections, asking, “Umm, how the fuck did we get here?” And if you don’t think sending the national guard to 19 Red States isn’t, at […]
Read More Trump To Send The National Guard To 19 States For An Election-Rigging Dress Rehearsal!!Something’s gone incredibly wrong if American voters are more likely to overlook rape allegations than the modern-day Catholic Church. Sure, the Conclave process may still be chock-full of religious misogyny, but then again, that’s a selling point for the republican party. I must say it’s refreshing to have an election in this day and age […]
Read More Little Known Fact About The New Pope He’s A U-S-A-Men!!!Last year, it came to light that self-described homophobe and Speaker of the House Mike Johnson had a bizarre arrangement with his teenage son Jack (No, not the singer/surfer Jack Johnson, although in this scenario, I bet the Speaker wishes). Apparently, the two Johnsons had an incestuous agreement to monitor each other’s porn intake like […]
Read More Why Is The FBI C*ck-Blocking A Potential Grindr Rendezvous With Speaker Mike Johnson?!?So what’s the point of even having elections if every sore loser will lie, cheat, steal, bitch, and moan until they get the results they desire? This entire scenario sounds much more like corruption than a conflict of interest. MAGA NC Supreme Court Justices overturning the results of a free and fair election over politics […]
Read More After Losing 3 Recounts, MAGA Overturns NC Supreme Court Election, Throwing Out 60K+ Legal Votes!!!In the least shocking development since Los Angeles spontaneously combusted once again, causing hundreds of thousands to be displaced by relentless wind-driven wildfires devastating the region. A self-driving car malfunctioned, leaving its time-strapped passenger attempting to make his flight with no self-troubleshooting go-to options on the fly. Perhaps the software engineers tasked with solving any […]
Read More Despite Ignoring It’s Airport Destination Driverless Car Successfully Circles Parking Lot!!!
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