Tag: The Daily Beast

The Declaration Of Independence Reads Like A 1-Star Yelp Review Of Trump’s Presidency!!!

You would assume Donald Trump would have a lot more in common with a bunch of land-owning white guys who didn’t want to pay taxes and thought minorities shouldn’t vote. Yet, if you’ve read the American Founding Fathers’ Declaration of Independence, it sounds more like Jefferson’s 1-star Yelp review of Trump’s presidency. Trump has so […]

Read More The Declaration Of Independence Reads Like A 1-Star Yelp Review Of Trump’s Presidency!!!

A Qatari Air Force Base In Idaho Is Sending Some Serious “America First” Mixed Messages!!!

Sure, Donald Trump has an “America First” agenda, but so did Osama Bin Laden, and I don’t remember Fox News calling him “Patriotic”. I mean, allowing Qatar’s Air Force to set up shop in Idaho might be good news for the state’s lone Halal grocery shop, “Atta Boy’s,” but not so much for the residents […]

Read More A Qatari Air Force Base In Idaho Is Sending Some Serious “America First” Mixed Messages!!!

Thanks To Trump’s Government Shutdown, Air-Traffic Controllers Are Winging It!!!

Donald Trump took time out of hanging federal employees, no longer useful to him, out to dry, or, as KKKaroline calls it, “The Epstein Severance Package,” to send Secretary of Transportation Sean Duffy (The one Trump appointee who heard the MAGA slogan “Trans For Everyone”, and thought “My job just got a whole lot harder!”) […]

Read More Thanks To Trump’s Government Shutdown, Air-Traffic Controllers Are Winging It!!!

Bleach Bondi Goes Full “Mean Girls” At Hearing After Photos Reveal Her Senator Burn Book!!!

Attorney General and inspiration for MAGA Cunt Barbie, Pam Bondi, proved once again why she is so uniquely qualified to be Matt Gaetz’s Sloppy-Seconds. Bleach Bondi arrived at yesterday’s Senate hearings armed with only a notebook, her personality, and looks, all of which can be described as even more damaging to the evil stepmom image […]

Read More Bleach Bondi Goes Full “Mean Girls” At Hearing After Photos Reveal Her Senator Burn Book!!!

Trump’s Military Frowns Upon Beards, Fatsos, Women, Americans, And N-Words!!!

Donald Trump took time out of his busy, shutting-down-the-government schedule (or, as he prefers to call forcing people to work without pay, “The Art of the Steal!”) to gather all the US Generals stationed around the globe for whatever the fuck a “Warriors’ Ethos Pep Rally” means.  Well, as it turns out, labeling an Authoritarianism […]

Read More Trump’s Military Frowns Upon Beards, Fatsos, Women, Americans, And N-Words!!!

Now That Anti-Fascists Are Terrorists, Will Trump Now Negotiate With Democrats?!?

Donald Trump’s UK exit interview with Prime Minister Keir Starmer went about as well as any WWIII-provoking humble-brag can. After President Chatty Kathy couldn’t help but spill all the tea about taking back control of Bagram Air Force base in Afghanistan from the Taliban. A clearly classified conversation, he undoubtedly had with a high-ranking US […]

Read More Now That Anti-Fascists Are Terrorists, Will Trump Now Negotiate With Democrats?!?