
The Senate attended a classified briefing on Operation Midnight Hammer, AKA the codename for the US bombing campaign on Iran, and also how Pete Hegseth describes his rigorous late-night masturbatory sessions. And despite both Democrats and Republicans disagreeing along party lines on Trump’s assessment of the bombing’s effectiveness, they did, however, unanimously agree that Trump is so unhinged at this point an unflattering Kimmel monologue could trigger World War III. Meanwhile, Trump is somehow furious at Democrats for his own Defense agency having more leaks than the first five seconds of a Flex Seal commercial. Considering intel discrediting Trump’s characterization of the damage sustained to Iran’s nuclear capabilities was getting passed around more than genital warts at Laura Loomer’s CPAC afterparty. Prompting Chief propagandist and White House staffer voted most likely to purposely leave her puppy in a hot car, Karoline Leavitt, to ensure the public that this regime’s “classified intelligence is not ending up in irresponsible hands.” Because nothing screams, “We Run An Air-Tight Administration!” more than accidentally texting classified war plans to random reporters over the exact unsecured burner phone Pete Hegseth sends his unsolicited dick-pics with.







The Guardian Article Quoted – https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/jun/26/trump-iran-strikes-intelligence-congress
In Today’s Palate Cleanser, we learn to qualify for an Einstein Visa, you need to acquire either a Nobel Prize, Olympic Medal, Pulitzer Prize, or, in rare cases, a rich fatso willing to break all the rules for a mail-order bride with fake tits.

