

Sure, Trump’s unprovoked attack against Iran has been considered widely unpopular; however, the change of scenery alone has Minnesota stress farts down 90%. Something Kristi Noem couldn’t fix, even with the perfect Pepto Bismol costume. Apparently, invading sovereign land, “America First,” was even a more detrimental decision to this nation than Stephen Miller’s parents believing “Pull-and-Pray” was a contraception cheat-code. But hey, at least Donald Trump realized his mistake and did what any good Christian Man in his position would do: Blame the nearest woman. So, let’s send our deepest thoughts and prayers to Cosplay Kristi in her time of need, because it’s the only meaningless gift you can give to someone who values Spirit Halloween coupons.




The Daily Beast Article Quoted – https://www.thedailybeast.com/dhs-insiders-spill-what-really-got-ice-barbie-fired/


In Today’s Palate Cleanser, The Daily Show Fox-Splains how Donald Trump turned a botched Epstein cover-up into a blanket distraction titled: “Iran-So-Far-Away For Dummies.” Despite Pete Hegseth’s concern that a more strategic use of American missiles would be: “Can’t we just bomb the shit out of the Epstein Survivors?”

Hey, you can make fun of Jim Jordan flip-flopping on war all you want, but nothing is more rock solid than his unflinching support for pedophiles. Well, unless Coach Jordan is in a collegiate locker room full of tween wrestlers, then his penis is definitely more solid….

