Even The Buckingham Palace Office Xmas Party Turned Into A Sh*tshow!!!

Each and every year, holiday parties take place across the globe. Sometimes, the fallout from these festive gatherings can permanently alter your work environment. Potential mishaps can range from an unplanned inter-office pregnancy between the formerly married CFO “Drunk Kathy” and Bruce, the new guy who clearly over-dyes his mustache, himself. To Thom in accounting, doing enough Columbian-Marching-Powder to make the “Cocaine Bear” hold a Zoom intervention in Thom’s honor. Just before his highly inappropriate “Keeping It Real” version of a “Chappelle Show” impersonation failed to hit the mark. The one which coincidently coincided with the last memory any of Thom’s coworkers ever had of him. However, he followed up his performance with a sudden resignation letter and retirement from all his known social media accounts. If you sincerely think, that bouts of binge drinking and oversharing are only taking place at your Xmas corporate gatherings, you’d be severely underestimating the power of the holiday spirits.

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It seems The Buckingham Palace cleanup crew gets lit up like the yearly Rockefeller Center tree-lighting-ceremony at their seasonal company-sponsored events. But apparently, this 24-year-old trashed tornado swept through the pub, leaving nothing but busted glass and employees in her terror path. It’s cock-eyed lightweights like this “Crown”-extra, ruining the good times for everyone else. The only thing worse than waking up hungover to news that the King of England had to make a public statement about your afterparty-blackout, is finding out your new nickname is “Two-Can Samantha.” If the catalyst for Christmas Party games and other forced fun initiatives watering down the once intoxicating work party scene are party-foul examples such as this? We must avoid these mistakes at all costs.

If the stars of your annual Merry-Mazel-Tov mixer are the Debbie Downers from the hr department, you are partying all wrong, and updating your LinkedIn page may be in your best professional interests. That’s unless you work with someone as hilarious as Kate McKinnon’s human resource character in the movie “Office Christmas Party.” If you have yet to watch her interpretation of the job, you’re missing out on an instant Christmas classic. A little-known fact about the aptly titled 2016 movie is that it was born and raised in a manger-like comedy sketch at the SNL Writer’s meeting in the 30 Rock television studios. It came about much like the tale of Jesus H. Christ himself did, a bunch of young minds working together to pen a timeless, feel-good story, minus all the homophobic reimagining, of course.

Speaking of the holiday themes rampant throughout Hollywood, I must say that I’ve never been a fan of a comedic series delving into those niche realms. Whether it’s Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc, these woefully lackluster episodes give you a noticeable feeling of emptiness that being gifted a fruit cake from someone you once thought loved you often does. However, the production staff and cast of “The Office” always set themselves apart from their counterparts on these episodes with their consistent comedic detail. They each deserve last-gift pick rights in their family’s Yankee swap. Well, maybe Emily Blunt has earned the cleanup slot in the Krasinski household due to her on-screen achievements (Jim Halpert’s smoking real-life wife). To prove this point, I came across this clip recently featuring the actual pictures Steve Carrell’s timeless character Michael took during filming on the set. A slice of television history that a collector would die to have, an SD card like that is a priceless showpiece.

In Today’s Palate Cleanser, we find out the hard way how easy it is for Comedy Writers to mail it in during the holidays.