Congratulations, Donald Trump, even being judged, on a pig-who-ate-his-own-blanket scale, you’re still a fucking meathead. This entire Trump misnomer, Portland, Oregon, “is in shambles,” all started a few weeks back when Fox News mistakenly aired footage from the 2020 BLM protests, and like any dementia-riddled Grandma seeing an AI image for the first time, Trump flipped the fuck out. However, instead of calling his grandson-aged son Barron on a rotary phone to have him explain the inner workings of the 21st century, like most well-adjusted olds do. Trump called the Department of War and said, “Gas up the tanks, boys! We’re invading Poland!” To which Pete Hegseth replied, “Do you mean Portland, sir?” “Yes, of course, that’s exactly what I said, Portland…Poland, Oregon!” As Trump maniacally mumbled into a ketchup bottle, which he somehow convinced himself was a MAGA-themed iPhone. When in reality, if he truly wanted to stop the protests he’d been vigorously masturbating to, on Fox and Friends, with a horrified aide taking notes within his blast radius. Trump didn’t need Pete Hegseth, the Marines, or even the Avengers; he needed Doc Brown, Marty McFly, and a plutonium-fueled Delorean traveling 88 mph back to the year 2020. Because back here on planet Earth in 2025, the extent of the protest in Portland is a handful of disappointed stoners outside an ICE detention center, who likely saw television cameras and thought, “Portlandia sketch?… Sweet!”
The Guardian Article Quoted – https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/sep/05/trump-portland-video-protests
2020 Portland Protests
VS 2025 Portland Protests
In today’s Palate Cleanser, Mike Johnson, Speaker of the House, and the 2nd most popular name in prank phone call history, behind Mike Hunts Mels, is doing everything in his power to delay the release of the Epstein Files indefinitely. Just in case there was a slight scheduling error, the last thing Johnson needs is to show up at Rapture 2025 as an “Outed” pedophile’s plus 1.
The Meidas Touch Network Article Quoted – https://meidasnews.com/news/mike-johnson-delays-swearing-in-adelita-grijalva-to-block-final-signature-on-epstein-petition
THE-ANTI-SOCIAL-MEDIA 